Whatz on my Mind

Welcome to summer

2010-06-23T09:06:00.000-07:00

And with summer comes a move. Scott, Mike and I have moved into an apartment...but not just any apartment, it's the same one that I lived in before Scott and I got married. Who would have thought? Not me. We are working diligently to try and figure out where everything goes. It's not easy fitting a 4 bedroom house with a garage and basement into a 2 bedroom apartment... But we are working on it.

Also keeping busy-Mike is in summer school (which is now on the other side of town) and baseball. Scott and I have been involved in church ministries. It just seems like we are constantly on the go.

Still working on the employment scene. It can be a full time job, just looking for a job.

All in all, it's good, because God has a plan!

And the roller coaster ride continues...

2010-05-20T19:46:00.000-07:00

I'm glad we're at the end of school, because Mike is driving me crazy. He gets overwhelmed with the load, doesn't do the work and scrambles to try and half complete everything.

He did have a valid excuse this year-a 4 week stint of in and out patient at a local mental health facility. But looking back...not sure about the whole experience.

We're packing to move to a 2 bedroom apartment. This should be fun.

I'm just basically wiped out.

Long time no ...

2010-03-27T07:03:00.000-07:00

Life has had its ups and downs. More downs than ups as of late.

Since we last spoke...Scott and I have both lost our jobs, our land lord is selling the house we live in, but is graciously letting us live here at a reduced rent. Scott had a cardiac episode which lead to a stay at Edward and several tests later... And he was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea. Not to mention our youngest is having the struggle of his life.

Can I catch a break here?

Someone said to Scott-the closer you are to God, the harder the enemy tries to get you out of His grasp. I guess that's true.

Jeremiah 29:11 - GOD HAS A PLAN!

What kind of legacy will I leave?

2009-09-06T17:13:00.000-07:00

If God took me home today, besides my family, who would really miss me? How have I touched people, and what kind of actions have I taken that have affected others in a positive way?

I think over my life. The words I have said, the things I have thought and my actions. And I wonder. Am I the best Christ follower I can be? Probably not. Do I live a biblical example of life? Probably not in everything I do.

All I can do is pray that God will guide my words and actions to be an example that He would be proud of.

Frustration is ongoing

2009-09-01T19:11:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I had a hysterectomy. I knew I was going to have pain...but not strange new pains that occur. I look online for help and see that there is a myriad of things that can happen to women post hysterectomy. Is this "normal"? I don't know. I'm just tired of being tired and in pain. And I'm back to running a fever. My pain is definitely worse towards the end of the day.

Yes, I will be calling the doctor again.

I will praise God for all he does, and I know there is a message and a testament to His glory in what I am going through.

But sometimes I just get frustrated and tired. Is this normal?

What is normal, anyway??

Frustration of a lot of things

2009-08-29T05:10:00.000-07:00

You know, just when you think you're on the edge of it all getting better, you get slapped upside the head with something else.

Nothing big. Nothing life threatening. But another 3 or 4 steps backward.

Sometimes, you just get tired of fighting it all.

And the ride continues

2009-08-27T08:13:00.000-07:00

Still running a fever after more than a week. I feel exhausted and frustrated. I knew that this was going to be difficult, but I thought I would be better at handling it. I'm sure a bit of depression is creeping in as Scott and I are strugging financially again. My disability benefit will hit, right when I go back to work. Oh well, it is what it is.

My oldest son did not go into the military as planned, and now is living in the real world looking for a job.

The struggles continue on the custody front with my step son and his mother. Amazing is all I can say to that!!

God has a reason for all that happens and He will be glorified in it all!!

Gone a while

2009-08-24T19:22:00.000-07:00

For those of you who don't know, I had a hysterectomy 4 weeks ago. It's been a wild pain ride and an emotional roller coaster to boot. I will try to update more tomorrow, when I have the patience to sit here and type.

:)

struggling

2009-07-14T22:09:00.000-07:00

With Jacob's departure, I am struggling. In my head, I know this is not my doing. But listening to words said, I FEEL totally responsible for tearing a family apart. I am hurting more than I ever imagined I could. I ache for my husband who (temporarily) has lost his son. And I don't know what I can do to make it right.

Steps on the path of life

2009-07-09T13:10:00.000-07:00

I seem to trip over the cracks in the sidewalks.

Our middle son and my husband had a blow up for a lot of reasons, but to make a long story short, he has decided to live with his birth mother. Scott is hurting, and I don't know how to make it better.

I know in my head that it's not my fault, but my emotional self wants to take the blame.

I'm just tired.

Long time, no see me!

2009-06-29T10:38:00.000-07:00

I have been comsumed by Facebook, and well, other past times... I'm still here and I'm still surviving. Will be posting later and kind of give the update!!

Whatz that all about...

2008-10-21T21:12:00.000-07:00

For today's post, I threw some thoughts over on my hubby's political blog...

More later.

Lemmings...

2008-10-10T11:32:00.000-07:00

Why do people just BLINDLY believe anything they read that's bad about their opposing candidate? I can't believe the crap that is emailed to me from friends who support the "other" party, slamming my candidate and making up lies. And when I counter them with truthful news pieces, all of a sudden they shut up and can't say anything to me. Or the tell me what talk shows that I should be listening to, to hear the "unbiased" opinion...yeah not so much.

I guess I'm going to have to speak up and tell them not to send me this stuff anymore.

Smile, it's Friday.

I'm a Dodge Viper...

2008-10-10T06:10:00.001-07:00

I'm a Dodge Viper!

You're all about raw power. You're tough, you're loud, and you don't take crap from anyone. Leave finesse to the other cars, the ones eating your dust.

Take the Which Sports Car Are You? quiz.

And wouldn't I look good driving that??

The dawn of a new Era

2008-10-02T09:47:00.000-07:00

I had a tragic loss this morning. I have (or rather had) a beloved "I Love Lucy" coffee mug. Now years ago during my first marriage, I had a HUGE collection of Lucy memorabilia. My ex made some less than nice comments about Lucy and my collection; after that I sold or gave much of it away-that and the fact that I lost my house during the divorce and had no where to keep it all... But one of the items I kept, this mug, that had been a birthday gift from a long time coworker and friend. She gave it to my in 2001 and it has been on my desk at every job since. This morning in a disaterous turn of events, I was getting my morning coffee and it fell off the counter and shattered. If I hadn't been heading for training, I would have burst out in tears. Which I shed a few later in the morning.

I'm just wondering if this is a sign of things to come. With my company seeming to be up in the air about many issues, and for some reason, I can't obtain a second part time job...bit by bit, my world around me is crumbling. I'm trying to remain steady, steadfast and strong. I'm not sure how long that will last.

Now, I know in the grand scheme of things, the loss of my mug is so very minor. Considering our middle son has recently been diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome (which is why I'm trying to stay strong for my husband...), and our finances are less than perfect and with the way the economy is going...well you get that idea. There are things that are so much more important. But for me, it was a piece of my world that I destroyed and I will never get back.

I know, I know, build a bridge and get over it. And I will.

Another day another 25 cents

2008-09-22T21:31:00.000-07:00

It seems that we've gotten to that point, financially. I'm getting tired of driving 50 miles round trip every day to a job that I wonder if it is still going to be there. And am I really happy there? Not sure. Right now I'm looking for a second job to work part time. We're hoping this helps our financial situation. Just very frustrating all around.

More later.

Singin' in the Rain....

2008-09-13T07:42:00.000-07:00

Today is our company picnic and it has been raining for the past 24 hours. My guess is this thing is going to be a bust. People were already cancelling before...now, who knows.

Scott and I missed our trip to Springfield, but had fun yesterday anyway. We ran errands, had a nice lunch and dinner out (courtesy of a couple of gift cards) and saw the movie "Get Smart". Stinking HYSTERICAL. I can highly recommend it to anyone our age who remembers the original...

I have been asked by Scott and Kemp to be a guest writer on their blog this weekend, but I will have to take care of it later.

More to come.

Rounding out the week/month

2008-08-29T09:46:00.000-07:00

Hard to believe that we are at the end of August. School has started and all 3 boys seem to be getting into the groove. The dog is nearing the end of treatment for her kennel cough (which I swear I got!!) Scott is having back pain, I am having shoulder pain...the fun goes on and on!!

We're looking forward to a quiet weekend, but I'm sure that something will divert our attention from relaxing. I'd like to get a few projects done around the house this weekend, but I don't want to get my hopes up on it. We got a rose bush as a wedding/house warming present, and NEED to get it into the ground-that is a must. Laundry is piling up, so will be taking care of that, too.

Also want to get the wedding pictures online so the family can see them. Gee, it's only been 3 months!

More to come

You'd think things would settle down by now...

2008-08-21T07:21:00.000-07:00

The party's over...and was it a blast!! Roughly 60 people passed through the doors at 634 Morningside. It poured rain (thank goodness we had our gazebo up and had borrowed a pop up one from Scott's brother!) but all in all, it was super! Scott and I now have to work on thank you notes!!

School has started and I'm not sure whether to be relieved or slightly sad, as all 3 are in high school. Darn is it expensive!! The 2 youngest need $100 calculators. Scott and I have to wait until next pay day to accomplish this. And I am watching all good deals, so you know I won't be paying full price!! LOL!

Seems like every day flies by and the evenings go faster. Getting out of bed at 6 just basically sucks. Seems like I'm not getting enough sleep. Sigh.

Work is unusual, as I think we are either "merging" or getting bought out. Things are tense and people are totally on edge. The process seems to be going rather quickly, too. Should be interesting to track the changes...if I'm here to track them.

From the "If It's Not One Thing, It's Another" files:

-The dog got Kennel Cough at the vets while she was there during our party...so we have to get her some meds for that.

-Someone threw a rock through Justin's rear window last week, and the next day his back door window shattered. We replaced the rear window at a cost of close to $300 but have resorted to heavy plastic and tape to get us by on the other window.

We will get through it. God doesn't give us anything we can't handle. But I'm sure He's got a sense of humor as to how we react to some stuff.

More later!

2 months later...

2008-08-06T06:33:00.000-07:00

Okay, apparently I have been busy. Parties, baseball, baseball, baseball, stuff around the house, dr's appointments, dentists, work, and more work. I'm looking forward to a break. That will come AFTER our big open house this weekend. Yes, 60+ people coming to share in the joy of our marriage. Aaaaahhhhh! What was I thinking?? It should be fun, but I'm gonna lose my mind getting ready.

We have a new dog, and believe it or not, her name is Princess. She tried to eat Princess Cici-natural dog instinct. So my free dog cost me $600 in bunny vet bills. The bunny is none the worse for wear, however she does sometimes growl. Interesting.

Lost a diamond out of my ring. I feel so bad. I hope Scott doesn't think it's because I'm careless or don't like the ring or whatever. We haven't had it fixed, so I guess I get what I deserve.

More to come.

Moved and Married

2008-05-28T12:24:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm now Mrs. D!! I'm very lucky and blessed that Scott wants me for the rest of his life. Okay and now, he's stuck! LOL!!

Now that the wedding weekend is over, we can settle into some sort of a routine. I hope. With my 2 boys in baseball, and Scott's son is still in school til June 12, routine is a fluid and variable word.

Work becomes increasingly uncomfortable for me, and it's a couple of people creating my stressful environment. I've decided to let their little antics just roll off my back. They are looking for a response, and I'm not gonna give them one.

I'll post more later.

My mind is still missing, any one see it?

2008-05-15T08:14:00.000-07:00

We're in and the house is just plain chaos! A week and a half to the wedding, and I'm sure I'm forgetting something somewhere. Have to get the rest of our stuff out of our respective places. Not that there is any room in our house for more stuff. Boy, are we gonna have one rockin' grodge sale.

Our move was slightly rocky, with a fridge that had its moments, but is now working, the furnace that acted up and went out on Saturday and the deluge of water we got in the basement on Sunday. Well, if it all happened at once and we're still standing-more power to us!

Princess CiCi is not a happy girl right now and the cable guy scared the crap out of her on Tuesday. She'll live! Not so sure about my fish, however.....

As my brain is spinning, I will post more thoughts. That or throw up.

Have I lost my mind??

2008-05-08T14:15:00.000-07:00

Maybe...

My almost hubby and I are both moving our houses tomorrow. I'm excited, but man, I have a lot junk left to pack. Sigh. I can hardly wait til this is over.

:)

With great sadness

2008-05-05T18:32:00.000-07:00

Hollie Wulf, the woman mentioned earlier in my blog passed away Sunday at the age of 41. She leaves behind an 8 year old and husband.

I am grateful to God for my health, my family and friends.

"For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

Be blessed and thank God for all you have.

I'm Blessed

2008-05-02T06:01:00.000-07:00

I made it thru my surgery with flying colors and am at home recovering. I am blessed and quite lucky to have Scott by my side. Without him, I would have been a mess. Good thing we're getting married!! I am totally honored that he wants to spend the rest of his life with ME!

Please pray for Hollie, as she is hanging on to dear life.

Hollies Journey

2008-04-29T07:06:00.000-07:00

I have posted a link to Hollie's blog of amazing strength, wit and humor with all that she's going thru. Please pray for her!!
http://lifeisnotabowlofprunes.blogspot.com/

Things are closer than they appear

2008-04-29T06:49:00.001-07:00

As several big things approach: surgery, moving, wedding; I am overwhelmed and excited all at once. I want to blink and be standing at the altar...this is the time I wish I could be like Bewitched!! I'm not scared about the surgery, just a little frantic about the recovery time. With moving and all, I need to be on my game.

I am reading the post of another blogger-a woman I know from local Yahoo bargain boards-who is suffering with pancreatic cancer that has spread to her instetines and stomach. My heart and prayers to out to Hollie and her family. Makes my problems seem tiny minor.

So if you read this, thank God that you are healthy and have family and friends who love you, because without those things, nothing else makes sense.